


Office Gossip

by girlintheglen



Series: Quickies ... Under 1000 Words [16]
Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-08-02 14:07:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16306640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/girlintheglen/pseuds/girlintheglen
Summary: For LJ Section VII Short Affair Challenge





	Office Gossip

**Author's Note:**

> I have always envisioned Kitt Kittridge as a redhead.  I'm not sure why, and don't remember if there is a reference to that in the episodes in which he appears.  But to me, he does have red hair and beard.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Napoleon was aware of a conversation among several of the support staff as they huddled near the door to the cafeteria.  His first thought was that they were talking about him.  It wasn't ego, he assured himself, merely a statistical probability based on the number of women who did talk about him openly, winking and gesturing for him to call or stop by.

Of course he realized that sometimes, not as often but occasionally, the women were discussing his new partner.  Illya Kuryakin had arrived like a dust storm; suddenly, with zero visability.

Thinking about him now, as he conjectured the possibilities of the conversation he had only partially overheard, Napoleon was surprised to see the blond sitting alone in one corner of the room.  There seemed to be a wide swath of empty seats around him, leaving the American agent to wonder if it was due to Kuryakin's nationality.  This was UNCLE, a multi-national, non-political organization built around the need for cooperation in the pursuit of law and order.  He hoped this wasn't some ill-informed **plot** to isolate the Soviet agent, ostracizing him so that he …

"Hey, Illya!' The greeting interrupted Napoleon's train of thought. It was Kitt Kittridge who called out to Illya, joining him now at the table. Kitt was an affable sort of fellow, with a head of **copper** colored hair and a full beard.  As he sat down it struck Napoleon that these two were the antithesis of the conservative, clean cut image so carefully fostered by Alexander Waverly.

"Hello, may I join you?"  Napoleon had a cup of coffee now, and as he sat down to the pair of nodding heads and congenial expressions, he found himself feeling as though the day was off to an extraordinary start.  He had a new partner, and Illya was making friends among the agents… it felt good.

Kitt leaned in, speaking in a low tone.

"Did you see that little squad of gossips in the hallway?" He had a twinkle in his eye as he spoke.  Kitt was known for his humor, something was definitely up.

"There's a rumor goin' round that a female agent is going to be joining the ranks of Section II in the next six months.  Those in the know are making bets on what she'll look like.  I think they expect some brawny pog who can go toe to toe with the men."

Napoleon was not conversant in Australian slang.

"What's a pog?" The look of confusion made Illya laugh out loud.

"It's a … hmmm… a reference to a, shall we say, slightly unattractive woman.  It is interesting that an assumption is made that a beautiful woman cannot also be effective as an enforcement agent."  Now Napoleon was wondering how Illya knew Australian slang.

"How did you know that? And why don't we have this information about a female operative?" Illya and Kitt each shrugged their shoulders in answer to Napoleon's concerns.

"Y'know mate, sometimes news travels from the bottom up. Those sheilas out there hold the reins on the information pipeline."

Another perplexed expression prompted both Illya and Kitt to answer Napoleon's unspoken question.

"A sheila is a girl." Napoleon made a face at that. Why couldn't people just speak English?

"You two make quite a pair, you know that? I need something to eat, and then we're due for a meeting upstairs." That made Napoleon pause.  Of course, the meeting with Mr. Waverly was probably to inform about the female agent.  At least the _sheilas_ in the hallway weren't that far ahead of them.  Illya interrupted that thought.

"And you believe he will be filling us in on the details?" Napoleon nodded. Looking at the other two men he smiled now, regaining his sense of equilibrium concerning intelligence gathering.

"This ought to be interesting.  Any thoughts on who she'll be, or rather what type of woman she is? _Sheila or pog?_ " Illya made a face at that.

"How crude of you Napoleon. But, in the interest of conjecture, I say sheila. Mr. Waverly has excellent taste."  Kitt nodded his agreement, and Napoleon had to admit it was very likely, considering that THRUSH already had an arsenal of beautiful women in their ranks.

"To the ladies then, all shapes and sizes, beautiful and, um… ", to which Illya chimed in.

"Reasonably pretty."

"Yes, well said tovarisch." The men held up their coffee cups and clinked in a toast to the future of UNCLE.

Of course, only Alexander Waverly could tell them what that would be.  Anything else was just, you know, _gossip._

 


End file.
